Humour

Perfect Pelosi troll by Trump

President Trump wasted no time in mimicking Nancy Pelosi (who handed out pens embossed with her name to celebrate the solemn occasion of signing the Articles or Impeachment) when he signed the USMCA into law.

Well played.

Ricky sets the record straight

https://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=Ktkqn-CyMI8

Ricky Gervais was true to form as usual in pointing out the hypocrisy of the attendees.

His best line was to tell the audience that they shouldn’t lecture the rest of us as they’ve spent less time at school than Greta Thunberg. The irony is that they probably don’t get the joke.

Russell Crowe felt compelled to talk of climate change in his acceptance speech. Not attending would have been the bigger gesture. Perhaps his impacts would be greater if he refused to allow his beloved South Sydney Rabbitohs to fly to away games or play at night under floodlights.

The Battle of Lilliput

Quite a good summary of the best moments for the Democratic debate last night done by conservative Ben Shapiro. FNF Media awaits howls from the leftists who will justify the complete garbage these politicians spewed.

Grab some popcorn. Elizabeth “Fauxcahontas” Warren gets completely poleaxed by Pete Buttigieg who attacked her hypocrisy over her criticism of him schmoozing with billionaires (from the 31st minute).

Joe Biden happily said “yes” to the losses of 100,000s of blue-collar jobs for climate change.

Andrew Yang lamented he was the only candidate of colour on the stage and that he wished that Cory Booker would be back to boost the ranks! Identity politics! Yawn.

Amy Klobuchar looked the best on the night as she clocked Buttigieg over his record in winning elections. Buttigieg won in South Bend, Indiana with a total of 8,000 votes which he championed as a success because he was a gay man in the evil Mike Pence’s home state. Klobuchar slapped him over the fact he lost the bid to be state treasurer in Indiana in 2010 by 25 points.

Alas, the winner of the debate, yet again, was Donald Trump.

Note since the impeachment announcement (which embarrassingly is not official according to Harvard law professor Noah Feldman, one of the Democrat’s star witnesses from the hearings), Trump has seen a surge in political donations. You can’t make this stuff up.

If you don’t have enough time to watch the full video above, spend 30 seconds watching Nancy Pelosi sound like a town drunk explaining her decision. It is an incoherent rabble.

Struggling for Xmas gift ideas?

Struggling for last minute Xmas ideas? Sadly this doesn’t exist but there are a whole host of people CM would hand them to.

Babylon Bee puts forward a comical description of what a Greta on the Shelf is programmed to do. She will detect activities including these:

• Leaving the light on when you exit a room

• Leaving the fridge open

• Driving an SUV

• Parents participating in illicit activities that may lead to the creation of more humans

• Using a plastic straw instead of sticking your face in a beverage and slurping

• Forgetting your reusable grocery bags at home

• Getting a cut-down Christmas tree

• Getting a carbon-heavy plastic Christmas tree

• Turning on any electric appliances

• Using the heater instead of rubbing two sticks together for warmth.